Using Social Media during Divorce

Using Social Media during divorce can be helpful or cause issues, depending on how you’re using it. There is a wealth of information (not all of it correct) on social media, as well as connections which may help you feel less alone. The downside of social media is that if you utilize it as a daily diary of your divorce proceedings, you’re opening yourself up to potential criticism, negative feelings, falsehood, jealousy, animosity the list goes on. Here are some tips for using social media during divorce.

1) Do not treat social media as a dear diary. I cannot stress this enough. You are a grown woman, not a 12 year old girl (sorry sister, but it’s true) and you need to act like an adult even though you may want to shout mean things about your ex from the rooftop. Write those things in an actual journal, or tell your close friends/family. Do not post anything that you wouldn’t want your children to read, or your colleagues, or your pastor/priest. You’ll thank me later. Trust me.

2) Evaluate your social media connections. Who are these people? Are they actual friends? Acquaintances? Weirdos from your past? Feel free to do a bit of a cleansing. You are in control of whose content you consume, and who gets to consume yours. Unfollow as needed.

3) Pay attention to how using social media is making you feel. If you are looking at funny memes and they make you laugh, great. If you are looking at everyone getting engaged and it’s making you cry, not great. Think about if your scrolling is creating negative feelings, and if it is, it’s time to consider reducing your time on social media or eliminating it all together.

4) Get off social media. This is the path I chose, and it’s not for everyone. I found I had too many connections I wasn’t close with and it felt uncomfortable to be going through that period of my life connected to anyone that wasn’t close to me. So I removed myself from platforms, rejoining when I felt I was in a better place to engage with more people.

If used in a certain way, social media can help you in your divorce by maintaining connections, however, if not used properly you’ll cause yourself heartache. Review your connections, only consume positive things and if all else fails just take a break. It’ll be there waiting for you when you’re ready to rejoin!

If you want to learn more about Finding Balance, check out this article.