Prioritizing Children of Divorce During the Holidays

Prioritizing your children of divorce during the holidays can be overwhelming and stressful.

You may feel angry about your current situation, sad about the loss you’ve experienced, or both – and children of divorce during the holidays are feeling this as well. As I approach holidays, I remember a story I heard from my family that I wanted to share with you. It’s about a Thanksgiving spent following the split between my grandmother and grandfather. To say that my grandmother was probably angry, bitter, hurt and resentful following their divorce is an assumption I can safely make. My grandmother had 5 children with my grandfather, but undoubtedly loved them more than she resented him.

As the holidays approached, my grandmother gave careful consider to what would make the holidays special for her children and what would support their relationship with their father. When Thanksgiving arrived, my grandmother did what only a loving mother focusing on her children would do: my grandmother cooked a full Thanksgiving day dinner for her children, she invited her ex-husband over to her home, and then she left the house so that he could spend the holiday with their children.  Can you believe this woman?

My grandmother is no longer with us, and I divorced after her passing, so I have never been able to ask her for any single parenting advice. All I can do now is look to her actions as examples of to how to love your children and always let your love for your children be greater than any other negative feelings you have.  My wish for you this holiday season is that you can do that. Because if you can let your love for your children be the guidepost for your decision making, you will always do what is right and best for them.

If you enjoyed this article, check out other managing divorce stress articles like this one.

Children of divorce during the holidays are likely experiencing all the same feelings you are and probably even ones you aren’t. Prioritizing their needs can help them with not just their feelings but will likely make you feel better, too. Give it a try!

Read our advice on how to lessen the impact of divorce on your kids.