Get five great tips on being happy alone after divorce – it’s possible!
Becoming alone after divorce means a change to your schedule and possibly frees up some of your time and being happy alone after divorce can be a whole new experience. I didn’t know what to do with my new free time after getting a divorce. I had never had any weekend time alone, and rather than being excited, I found it quite unsettling, and it caused me to feel anxious.
Unsure with how to pass the alone time quickly, I decided I needed to get a hobby. Now, having always worked full time and being the mom to 3 young kids, I had no hobbies to speak of. I was living with my mother temporarily at the time, and based on what was in the nearby proximity, decided to take the plunge into something new: Golfing.
Now, this was not something I was remotely familiar with or particularly interested in, but it was something I could do by myself on Sundays. So every other Sunday, I nervously and awkwardly took a golf lesson with a lovely older gentleman. It broke up the day and made the slow sad lonely time go by faster.
I’m not recommending you go out and get golf clubs (although it’s a great activity to pick up!) but I do recommend you find something new. Something that has little/no association with your past relationship, something that is just for you. Having trouble thinking of something? Here is a list of thirty things you can check out!
I cannot stress the importance of keeping yourself busy. If you allow yourself too much downtime, you could end up wallowing in self pity, or feeling worried, or likely a combination of the two. And having something that makes being happy alone after divorce can help you look forward to that time and use it productively just for yourself.
Here are 5 tips for picking a hobby:
1) Explore anything that has piqued your interest – this could be scrapbooking, cooking lessons, learning to speak another language etc.
2) Consider revisiting something that you did in the past by yourself that you stopped doing once you got married – were you a dancer, swimmer, photographer, blogger….dive back in!
3) Ask friends if there are any activities they do that you could join them in – this may include an adult kickball league, yoga, or maybe a volunteer group.
4) Choose something you will actually do! Don’t make it too far from home or too challenging to get started with. (I borrowed clubs when I first took golf lessons).
5) Have fun! Being happy alone after divorce is NOT a bad thing. Choosing something a little bit scary and out of your comfort zone is healthy. Do something a little fun and maybe a little intimidating, but make sure it’s something you can envision yourself having fun with!
For more tips on Staying Healthy During Divorce, check out this article on Self-Care.
Being happy alone after divorce is a good thing. It is a chance for you to refill your inner well, stay engaged and active and can help you self refresh so that all those times you are NOT alone are manageable and even enjoyable